Spoilers: None really. Set season two.
Warnings: Gratuitous use of the word 'groin'.
Notes: For allisnow. 1240 words, thanks to elfcat255 for the beta and the f word for the self defence tips.
When the door opened with a 'swish', John Sheppard found himself the attention of sixteen women he vaguely recognised and Teyla, who was stood a few feet away from them. She smiled at him, craning her neck to get a better look at him standing in the doorway.
“Can I help you Colonel Sheppard?” she asked, straightening up when Katie Brown dipped her head, blushing, and took a few steps to the side.
“What's going on?”
“I am teaching self defence and hand to hand combat,” she said, “as approved by Doctor Weir and as we discussed.”
“She didn't want to join you?”
“She is adverse to violence.”
“And the men?”
“The male scientists of the city did not seem as interested in joining in.” She nodded towards the group, as they shifted from foot to foot, blushing slightly, hot and sweaty, and avoiding looking at Sheppard. “Now, I would like to continue.”
“Can I watch?” Teyla turned to her class of anxious scientists, who nodded minutely.
“You can help with demonstrations,” she said, when there were no protests, and no signs of further embarrassment. She was amused that some of them had brightened a little at her suggestion.
“Maybe, we could go over the basics of defence against men one last time,” Miko said, putting her hand up. Teyla reached out and lowered the woman's hand, smiling warmly at her.
“Men? What about the Wraith?” John asked, coming to stand next to Teyla.
“There are more evils in this world than just the Wraith,” she said, “Wraith worshippers, men who wish to rob you money or life.”
“Muggers and murderers,” one of the scientists said.
“Your galaxy sounds as dangerous as mine.”
“Maybe, and isn't that a little sexist?”
“I do not know this word.”
“It means, isn't that prejudice against men,” Miko said.
“Only if we were not to cover how to deal with women in our next few classes.”
“Oh,” she wanted to laughed, but kept her poise for the moment, smiling at her class instead.
“Now, shall we begin with an escape from a simple wrist grab,” she said, addressing the class. “Colonel?”
They faced each other and John grabbed hold of Teyla's wrist. “How do we get out of this hold?” she asked.
“Twist against the thumb,” Katie Brown said, going to put her hand up but changing her mind. Teyla nodded, twisting her arm against John's hold, lifting her arm up and over him and breaking free.
“Okay,” John said smiling back at the women.
“Katie would you like to demonstrate a move?” Teyla asked. Katie nodded, stepping forward and approaching John. “Colonel, take hold of Dr Brown's shirt.” John looked at the tight t-shirt the red head was wearing and hesitated for a moment. Teyla simply smiled and he sighed in response, grabbing two fistfuls of white material and hoisting the woman up to her toes.
She reacted immediately, bringing her right arm at her elbow, her hand up in the air by her face. Her left arm she looped over one arm, then under his other, before she clasped her hands together and shook her arms from side to side with all her strength, face scrunched up. His grip on her loosened and she broke free, grinning.
He was starting to regret this. “Very good,” he said smiling back at her as she joined the group again.
“Are you not impressed Colonel?” Teyla asked.
“I am, shame some of the guys didn't join you, then we wouldn't have to protect so many of them,” he quipped.
The women laughed, and Teyla rolled her eyes. “Can you fight?” he asked. Miko stepped forward and smiled, hands shaking with nerves a little.
Teyla thought he was either brave or didn't really believe in her class' ability; but then, John Sheppard was a foolish man at times.
Miko stood opposite him, dressed in baggy -shirt and work-out pants, knees slightly bent, feel apart and her arms up. John stood in a lazier position and she moved with a rush of breath and adrenaline, bringing her elbow up into his throat. He clutched his hands around his neck, groaning, eyes wide with surprise. She didn't stop, lifting her leg up and brining her foot down hard on his, at the very spot where his foot met his ankle.
“Argh!” he yelled out as he grabbed the foot, falling back and hitting the floor with a thud.
“Very good Miko,” Teyla said, almost giddy with her delight, proud of her class.
“Thank you,” she said bowing her head towards Teyla, their foreheads meeting.
“I believe that is enough for today,” she said smiling and met each woman with a bow, reminding them to join her next week.
When they were alone, Teyla turned to where John was still sitting on the floor, rubbing his throat with one hand and the other on his foot. She suspected there was a little hurt pride that needed rubbing, too. She doubted he had expected such ability from her class. She reached out to him and he took her hand, letting her help him to his feet.
“Are you okay John?” she asked, smiling.
“I'm fine,” he said rubbing his neck again; “If she were stronger I don't think I'd be able to talk.” Teyla laughed. “What else have you been teaching them? Just in case I upset someone,” he said and she laughed again.
“We concentrated on the six weak spots of the human body,” she said, taking a step closer to him. “The temple,” she reached out and brushed his left temple with her fingertips, making him close his eyes and lean into the touch for a moment. “The eyes,” she ran her thumb under his eye and down the bridge of his nose. “The throat,” she leaned forward and kissed the bruises forming on his neck, making him shiver.
“What else?” he asked, voice a little gruff now.
She pressed her body against his, ran her foot up his. “The top of the foot,” she said, bringing her knee up, wrapping her leg against him. “The knees,” she kissed his lips, soft pressure on his for just a moment. “And what your people call the groin.”
“I'm glad you didn't have anyone demonstrate that on me,” he remarked
“I considered it,” she grinned an then laughed at the look of horror on his face.
“Some of this is fighting dirty you know,” he said holding her close to him.
“Fighting dirty? As in mud wrestling?” she asked in a confused tone.
“No, wait, who told you about mud wrestling?”
“I didn't mean mud wrestling,” he said. “I mean, fighting without honour. You know, shooting someone in the back, kicking a man when he's down.”
“The Wraith fight without honour,” she said, her voice sombre as she slipped away from his body.
“Sorry,” he said, letting her get a couple of feet away before pulling her back to him. “I didn't mean to offend you.” She smiled, letting him kiss her again, sighing and falling against his body. “Maybe I can get Weir to force some of the men to join your classes.”
“It would be in their best interests,” she said.
“I'll see what I can do,” he smiled. “In the mean time, why don't you show me what else you've been teaching your class.”
“Just go easy on me.”