Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Characters: Xander Harris, Willow Rosenberg, Buffy Summers, and Dawn Summers. Mentions of Rupert Giles, Faith Lehane, and Robin Wood.
Summary: Dawn is pregnant. The fact that she's nearly thirty, married, and totally living her own life right now seems to make no difference to the Standard Buffy Summers 'My Little Sister Has A Life' Crisis. She'd kind of hoped it would.
Author's Notes: The title is derived from Honey, by Arielle Greenberg. Thank you to ladybug218 for an awesome beta!
Written for brightknightie for the femme_fic inaugural ficathon, for the following prompt:
Characters: Buffy and Dawn, plus a reference to deceased Joyce
Prompt: Grown-up, married, normal-human, little-sister Dawn tells still-single, slayer, older-sister Buffy that Buffy will soon be an aunt.
"Ohmigod." Buffy was pacing around the counter and fanning herself with her hand. "Dawn! This is serious! I mean, this is the serious kind of serious."
Dawn leaned on the kitchen table, elbows bent and her chin propped on her fists, grinning as she watched Buffy freak. This? Was kinda funny. A little. If you were her.
Of course, one glance over to where Willow and Xander were trying to hide their smiles and look Very Mature And Adult told her that it wasn't just funny to her either.
"Buffy! Chill!" Dawn took a sip from her soda. Mmm. Yummy, fizzy, sugary goodness. "It's fine!"
"It's not fine!" exclaimed Buffy. Her eyes were wide, and Dawn kinda thought she was on the edge of hyperventilating. "You totally had sex, but only after you got married? Right? And that was gross enough, but now you're pregnant. And you're drinking soda! You shouldn't drink soda!" Before Dawn could stop her - stupid Slayer reflexes that she was never gonna have - Buffy snatched her soda away and was dumping it down the sink. "Too much caffeine isn't healthy for babies! Wait, you're my little sister. You can't have a baby!"
"Way to freak, Buffy," said Dawn dryly. "You know, Giles told me he was happy for me. And then he sent me flowers."
"That's Giles! Giles isn't your sister!" exclaimed Buffy. She whirled around and leaned back against the sink. Her eyes were wide.
"You know, you look just like you did when Willow told you she was gay," Dawn pointed out.
"Do you have a Lamaze coach?" asked Buffy.
Dawn frowned. "Lamaze coach?"
"Everyone has a Lamaze coach. That's part of being pregnant, right?" Buffy nodded. "Right. Baby clothes. Crib. Lamaze coach." She took a deep breath. "We can do this. Do you have a Lamaze coach?"
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Willow magic up some popcorn to share with Xander. Dawn rolled her eyes. She was so gonna get those two.
'We want to be there when you tell your sister, Dawnie.'
'It's such an important moment for Buffy, discovering she's going to be an aunt.'
'We'd call Faith, but she and Robin are too busy fighting the forces of evil in Bangladesh right now. Can we videotape this for them?'
Dawn was so gonna get those two a lot for this.
"I was thinking maybe my, I don't know, husband might be my childbirth coach?" Dawn kept frowning at Buffy. "It's not Lamaze anyway."
"Oh. Yeah. Husband." Buffy nodded again. Sometimes Dawn thought Buffy just nodded to shake her brain back into order. "Right. He can help. But I'm your older sister! I'm going to be there! I should know what's going on! With--" She made an ick face and looked nauseated. "Oh, God. I'm not even pregnant, and I'm getting morning sickness."
"Well, at least we know that if there are any vampires in the delivery room, she'll be right there to slay them," said Xander. He shoved a handful of popcorn in his mouth and smirked before he chewed and swallowed it. Dawn stuck her tongue out at him and Willow nudged him - hard - with her elbow. "I'm just saying! This is pretty much a win for the forces of good."
Buffy had one hand on her stomach, and Willow got up to go and put one arm around her. "Have some ginger," she said. She shoved her hand in her pocket and pulled out a piece of ginger candy. "I ran out and bought a bunch when Dawnie told us she was pregnant."
"I can't believe you told these guys and Giles first!" exclaimed Buffy. She unwrapped the candy and chewed on it as she pouted at Dawn. "Dawn!"
"I knew you were gonna freak," said Dawn calmly. She looked over at Xander. "You ever notice how Buffy doesn't break a sweat over an apocalypse, but when she finds out her completely married and totally normal sister, who is, by the way, nearly thirty, is pregnant, she's almost ready for a trip to the funny farm?"
"Totally," said Xander, through a mouthful of popcorn. He stared down at the popcorn. "This'd be better if it had butter."
"Xander!" exclaimed Willow. "This is a very important moment in Buffy and Dawn's lives!"
"I already told Dawn I was happy for her, and that I'd build her a crib and a changing table." Xander set the popcorn down. "Besides, I need some entertainment before the pregnancy craziness starts."
"Oh, Dawn." Buffy walked across the room and sat in the chair next to hers. She put her arms around Dawn and held her tight. Thankfully, not with Slayer strength, because ouch. "I'm so happy for you. I really am. I just wish Mom were here to see this."
Dawn burst into tears and leaned against Buffy. "Me too," she said, her voice choked. She hated the way her chest was heaving and her nose was running and she hated these stupid hormones making her cry, and not to mention the fact that she didn't have her mom here to tell her what she was going through was normal. "Buffy, I'm gonna have a baby, and Mom's not gonna be here to get to know her. Or him."
"She knows," said Buffy, and Dawn could feel tears splashing onto her shoulder from Buffy. "Somewhere out there, Mom knows, and she's happy for us."
Dawn nodded. "Yeah," she said, sniffling a little. She pulled one arm free and swiped the tears from her eyes, then smiled at Willow when she handed her a tissue. "Yeah, she is." She straightened up and tried to wipe her face off. "But I want her here, Buffy."
"Me too," said Buffy. She reached over and smoothed Dawn's hair back. "But we can buy a bunch of books, and I'll sign up for the childbirth class and go with you and your husband. I need to know what to do too." Dawn could see she had her best Responsible Adult Buffy face on. "We'll do the best we can without her."
"If you're there?" Dawn grinned even though her eyes were still watery, teary, pregnant-hormonal-mommy-to-be eyes. Buffy wasn't Mom, but she was Buffy. "I'll be fine. I know Mom would be proud."
Willow was sniffling behind them. Xander was too, but he was pretending they were allergies. "Oh, guys," said Willow. "We're gonna have a baby in the family."
"Oh, no!" exclaimed Xander.
Dawn twisted to look at him. "What?" she asked.
"You're gonna go into labor when the world is about to end," he said. He groaned and dropped his head back on his chair. "I just know it."
"With us?" Dawn couldn't help giggling, so she covered her mouth. It wasn't very dignified for pregnant, married, nearly-thirty women to giggle. "Probably."